1
00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:23,770
MAN: It's The Futurama
Holiday Spectacular
brought to you by...

2
00:00:23,980 --> 00:00:26,150
(READING)

3
00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:29,610
Ah, the Xmas season.

4
00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:31,690
Who wants a delicious
unshelled nut?

5
00:00:31,780 --> 00:00:33,900
Ooh, I'll have one.

6
00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:41,240
It's "nut" so good.

7
00:00:41,660 --> 00:00:42,790
(GROANS)

8
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:46,620
What's wrong, Fry?
Are you regretting
another wasted year?

9
00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:49,170
I don't know.
Something about Xmas

10
00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,840
just doesn't feel
like Christmas.

11
00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:52,380
(ALARM BLARING)

12
00:00:52,630 --> 00:00:55,760
Santa's coming!
Initiate defenses!

13
00:01:05,270 --> 00:01:08,230
God rest
ye merry gentlemen

14
00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:10,060
in peace.

15
00:01:14,150 --> 00:01:18,320
Can someone please explain
how you celebrate
this crazy holiday?

16
00:01:18,570 --> 00:01:19,820
Preferably in song.

17
00:01:21,870 --> 00:01:24,950
It's the violentest
season of the year

18
00:01:25,660 --> 00:01:28,920
When Kringle-bot
come dispensing
mugs of Xmas fear

19
00:01:29,670 --> 00:01:32,210
Sugar plummy
visions will be dancing
in your head

20
00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:35,260
When I cane you
from the comfort of my sled

21
00:01:36,260 --> 00:01:38,930
On Xmas Eve,
we don our gay apparel

22
00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:42,970
Kevlar vests,
asbestos stockings
and a barrel

23
00:01:43,060 --> 00:01:46,430
And if
Grandma's Xmas fruitcake
finally reaches critical mass

24
00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:49,100
It can be re-gifted
straight to Santa's ass

25
00:01:51,690 --> 00:01:55,150
But the ornamental armaments
are merely superficial

26
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,610
The tinsel and the trappings
are just icing on the missile

27
00:01:59,030 --> 00:02:03,200
The one thing that you need
to make your Xmas
Day splendiferous

28
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:07,250
Is a pine tree
A pine tree that's coniferous

29
00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:11,130
We have to have a pine tree
that's coniferous

30
00:02:12,210 --> 00:02:13,540
You're welcome.

31
00:02:14,550 --> 00:02:18,220
You know, Santa may
have killed Scruffy,
but he makes a good point.

32
00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:20,970
What we need is an
old-fashioned pine tree.

33
00:02:21,140 --> 00:02:22,260
Cram it, Virginia.

34
00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:25,850
Pine trees have been
extinct for over 800 years.

35
00:02:25,970 --> 00:02:27,980
Professor,
maybe there's some way

36
00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:30,020
to bring the pine
trees back to life.

37
00:02:30,100 --> 00:02:31,980
Like we did with
the barking snakes.

38
00:02:32,060 --> 00:02:33,400
(BARKING)

39
00:02:33,900 --> 00:02:35,820
Pine trees aren't
barking snakes.

40
00:02:35,900 --> 00:02:38,780
They won't just
turn up in a salad
at Olive Garden.

41
00:02:38,860 --> 00:02:43,200
But there is one
hope and, as usual,
it's Norwegian.

42
00:02:49,710 --> 00:02:53,330
(CREW SCREAMING)

43
00:02:57,340 --> 00:02:58,340
Behold!

44
00:02:58,590 --> 00:03:01,720
The Svalbard
Global Seed Vault.

45
00:03:01,840 --> 00:03:07,010
Since 2008,
the vault has preserved seeds
of every known plant species,

46
00:03:07,100 --> 00:03:08,720
in case of extinction.

47
00:03:08,810 --> 00:03:10,560
And I brought
a few seeds of my own.

48
00:03:11,190 --> 00:03:12,560
(BARKING)

49
00:03:12,940 --> 00:03:16,190
Halt! What's your
business pokey-poking
about the seed vault?

50
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,240
Guardian of mankind's
precious botanical
heritage there?

51
00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:22,200
We just want to come in
and rummage about a bit.

52
00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,950
Oh, so... Okay.

53
00:03:25,870 --> 00:03:28,450
Yo, ABBA,
what's that next door?

54
00:03:29,580 --> 00:03:32,040
That's the Germ
Warfare Repository.

55
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:33,290
It's so close.

56
00:03:33,460 --> 00:03:36,540
Is there any chance
of cross-contamination?

57
00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:38,250
No.

58
00:03:40,090 --> 00:03:41,760
Now, your pine trees
were all chopped down

59
00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:44,890
to make emergency toilet paper
during the Fifty-Year Squirts.

60
00:03:44,970 --> 00:03:47,310
Lucky the seeds have
been preserved here
in the vault there.

61
00:03:47,470 --> 00:03:49,220
What's that splork on them?

62
00:03:49,470 --> 00:03:51,640
It's not germs, is it?

63
00:03:51,730 --> 00:03:52,730
No.

64
00:04:05,070 --> 00:04:07,580
Now that's a tree
worth chopping down.

65
00:04:07,660 --> 00:04:10,330
Indeed,
'tis a lovely tree.

66
00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:13,870
'Twill truly be my
finest Xmas ever.
(SCREAMS)

67
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,080
(EXCLAIMING)

68
00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:18,130
That's what my
poll numbers need.

69
00:04:18,210 --> 00:04:21,510
Happy voters enjoying
some holiday cheer.

70
00:04:21,590 --> 00:04:25,840
As your vice-president,
I order you to
steal that tree.

71
00:04:27,510 --> 00:04:29,180
My fellow Earthicans,

72
00:04:29,260 --> 00:04:32,730
welcome to
the annual White House
Xmas-tree lighting,

73
00:04:32,850 --> 00:04:36,060
brought to you by
Gunderson's Nuts.

74
00:04:36,270 --> 00:04:37,270
WOMAN: Gunderson!

75
00:04:40,150 --> 00:04:41,690
(ALL CHEERING)

76
00:04:49,370 --> 00:04:52,410
Oh, no!
Could the seed
have been contaminated

77
00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:54,750
by a virus from
the germ vault?

78
00:04:54,870 --> 00:04:56,370
Yeah, I suppose.

79
00:04:56,460 --> 00:04:59,790
Wait.
This could be a good thing.
That weaponized virus

80
00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:02,630
made the sickly, little tree
grow big and strong.

81
00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:08,970
(PEOPLE YELLING)

82
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:18,560
Wait. This could be
a good thing.

83
00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:20,230
Reforestation has begun.

84
00:05:22,900 --> 00:05:24,570
Geez, with these...

85
00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:27,530
(ALL EXCLAIMING)

86
00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:46,970
Arguably, this could
be a good thing.

87
00:05:47,050 --> 00:05:49,930
The planet has returned
to its primeval state.

88
00:05:50,010 --> 00:05:53,510
Earth is just the way it was
before the white man came.

89
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,770
(DEVICE POWERING UP)
Good news.

90
00:05:55,930 --> 00:05:58,690
All these pine trees are
fighting global warming

91
00:05:58,770 --> 00:06:00,190
by producing oxygen.

92
00:06:00,270 --> 00:06:01,360
Happy now, Gore?

93
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:02,480
Yeah.

94
00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:05,360
But I'd be happier if
I had a set of lungs.

95
00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:09,950
Wait a second.
Oxygen levels are
rising too rapidly.

96
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:14,540
10%, 20%, 60%.

97
00:06:14,660 --> 00:06:16,290
As long as it
doesn't hit 70.

98
00:06:16,460 --> 00:06:18,120
80%.

99
00:06:18,290 --> 00:06:21,000
You know, I don't
recall having done
anything for a while,

100
00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:23,500
but I still feel
I deserve a smoke.

101
00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:25,840
(ALL GASP)

102
00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:28,630
Hey, cool.
The air is on fire.

103
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:35,890
Ho, ho, ho.

104
00:06:35,970 --> 00:06:37,680
Everyone's dead.

105
00:06:37,770 --> 00:06:42,650
Stay tuned for another tale
of holiday hilarity.

106
00:06:46,110 --> 00:06:48,900
MAN: Now back to
the Gunderson's Nuts

107
00:06:49,030 --> 00:06:51,820
Holiday Spectacular
featuring Futurama.

108
00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:54,910
Okay, crew.
Xmas break is over.

109
00:06:54,990 --> 00:06:58,160
It's time to
destroy these gifts
we forgot to deliver.

110
00:06:58,250 --> 00:06:59,710
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

111
00:06:59,790 --> 00:07:02,250
How come we get
off for every dumb
human holiday,

112
00:07:02,330 --> 00:07:04,420
but not for
robot holidays?

113
00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:06,460
Oh, Lord.
Not Robanukah.

114
00:07:06,550 --> 00:07:08,460
I'm talking about Robanukah,

115
00:07:08,550 --> 00:07:11,800
the holiest six
and a half weeks
in the robot calendar.

116
00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:16,350
That's just a fake holiday
you make up every year
to get out of work.

117
00:07:16,430 --> 00:07:17,970
Yeah. If it's real,

118
00:07:18,060 --> 00:07:20,850
how come there's no song
that explains how
to celebrate it?

119
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:22,440
Because there is.

120
00:07:22,690 --> 00:07:24,560
Hit it.
Hit what?

121
00:07:24,730 --> 00:07:26,860
I placed instruments
under your seats.

122
00:07:26,940 --> 00:07:28,860
Play them
or I'll break them
over your heads.

123
00:07:30,780 --> 00:07:33,700
(SINGING)
Robanukah may sound
as if it's Jewish

124
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:37,830
But its
ancient-sounding customs
are exceptionally newish

125
00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:41,000
So take a hearty swallow
from your robo-Kiddush cup

126
00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:43,710
Which will give me time
to quickly make them up

127
00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:45,130
(BURPS)

128
00:07:45,210 --> 00:07:47,710
Do you spin
a dreidel made from clay?

129
00:07:48,460 --> 00:07:51,550
Mine is called a droid-el
and it's rigged
to make you pay

130
00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,350
Do you eat these yummy,
tin-wrapped
chocolate coins?

131
00:07:56,890 --> 00:07:59,970
Better. We got fem-bots
with illegal five-speed groins

132
00:08:00,060 --> 00:08:02,890
Shalom, Ruth and Esther.

133
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,400
Why with the music
so loud?

134
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:08,820
Would it kill him
to turn up the heat
a little in here?

135
00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:12,320
By far, the most
important thing is oil

136
00:08:12,570 --> 00:08:15,870
To keep the lamp light burning
or to help the latkes broil

137
00:08:15,950 --> 00:08:19,830
No, we pour the holy lubricant
out from this sacred vessel

138
00:08:19,910 --> 00:08:22,910
into this blessed
pit so they can wrestle

139
00:08:23,250 --> 00:08:26,630
The extra made-up touch
that makes Robanukah so special

140
00:08:26,710 --> 00:08:30,170
is the oil in which the
nasty fem-bots wrestle

141
00:08:30,340 --> 00:08:33,420
We shall now begin the
traditional oil wrestling.

142
00:08:33,510 --> 00:08:37,300
Will the referee bring out
the ceremonial cruse
of petroleum oil?

143
00:08:39,140 --> 00:08:41,020
Thank you, Abraham.

144
00:08:41,220 --> 00:08:44,270
Not in the hair, please.
I just had it did.

145
00:08:47,940 --> 00:08:49,110
Oh, no.

146
00:08:49,190 --> 00:08:51,780
These broads are
supposed to wrestle for
six and a half weeks,

147
00:08:51,860 --> 00:08:55,030
but there's only
enough petroleum oil
for four and a half weeks.

148
00:08:56,700 --> 00:08:58,070
We're still
getting paid, right?

149
00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,620
I told you it's an audition!

150
00:09:00,700 --> 00:09:04,080
Bender, four and a half weeks
of oil wrestling
sounds like plenty.

151
00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:06,920
This isn't
a lousy reform Robanukah.

152
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:08,920
We need more petroleum oil!

153
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:17,340
I got me some whale oil,
some squirrel oil.

154
00:09:17,430 --> 00:09:20,180
Not kosher!
It has to be petroleum oil!

155
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:23,810
Do you not give a damn
about the hallowed
traditions of Robanukah?

156
00:09:23,890 --> 00:09:25,520
I reckon I do not.

157
00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:27,980
Anyways, Earth done run out
of petroleum oil.

158
00:09:28,150 --> 00:09:29,270
(ALL GASP)

159
00:09:29,520 --> 00:09:31,190
I tried to warn you.

160
00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:33,730
One unit of free,
limitless solar power, please.

161
00:09:38,990 --> 00:09:41,660
That'll be,
I don't know, 10 bucks.

162
00:09:42,490 --> 00:09:44,700
Can you make change
for a Nobel Prize?

163
00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:48,370
Man, can't we just make
more petroleum oil?

164
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,250
I'm afraid not, son.

165
00:09:50,500 --> 00:09:52,880
Petroleum only forms
when organic matter

166
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:57,970
is subjected to intense
pressure for hundreds
of millions of years.

167
00:09:58,180 --> 00:10:00,720
I can't wait that long.
I've got ADD.

168
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:03,310
This is so unfair.

169
00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:06,850
I don't wrestle dry, Bender.
I went to Vassar.

170
00:10:06,980 --> 00:10:10,730
Professor, I want you
to look these poor
floozies in the eye

171
00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:13,520
and tell them their
oil-wrestling days are over.

172
00:10:21,910 --> 00:10:26,040
I suppose there could
be a minute quantity
of petroleum left,

173
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,460
but it would be insanely
deep within the Earth

174
00:10:28,540 --> 00:10:30,620
at pressures so
dangerously high...

175
00:10:30,710 --> 00:10:31,960
(HORN HONKING)

176
00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:33,670
Let's go, already!

177
00:10:45,890 --> 00:10:48,100
Setting Bachman Turners
to Overdrive.

178
00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:52,980
We're getting pretty deep.
Look! Mole coffins.

179
00:11:04,830 --> 00:11:07,330
AMY: Oh, no.
We tunneled into a tunnel.

180
00:11:07,950 --> 00:11:11,370
What's that loud,
boring sound you'll hear
when I stop talking?

181
00:11:12,250 --> 00:11:15,750
FARNSWORTH: (GASPS)
It's an albino humping worm.

182
00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,380
Why do they call it that?

183
00:11:18,670 --> 00:11:21,090
Because it doesn't
have any pigment.

184
00:11:25,100 --> 00:11:26,680
What's our depth, Captain?

185
00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:28,770
Forty kilometers, 50.

186
00:11:28,850 --> 00:11:31,520
There must be petroleum oil
down here somewhere.

187
00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,190
Go deeper. Deeper!

188
00:11:33,270 --> 00:11:36,440
No, Bender.
The ship can't withstand
this much pressure.

189
00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:39,610
Sometimes it falls
apart just sitting
in the hangar.

190
00:11:39,690 --> 00:11:42,530
Professor,
I've never asked for
anything before,

191
00:11:42,860 --> 00:11:44,700
but seeing those
fem-bots glistening

192
00:11:44,780 --> 00:11:47,280
with oil means more
to me than life itself.

193
00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:53,290
Call me an old fool,
but I believe the Lord is
speaking through you.

194
00:11:53,420 --> 00:11:55,710
Brace yourselves, everyone.

195
00:11:59,050 --> 00:12:00,130
One hundred kilometers.

196
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:02,720
Two hundred.

197
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:04,220
I hate to complain
about the heat,

198
00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:06,640
but the air conditioner's
on fire.

199
00:12:08,560 --> 00:12:10,270
My ice cream Manwich!

200
00:12:16,650 --> 00:12:18,110
What the hell
are we doing?

201
00:12:18,190 --> 00:12:22,320
We're all gonna die
so this junkyard golem
can celebrate Robanukah.

202
00:12:23,030 --> 00:12:25,530
You vile racist.

203
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:27,910
Haven't my people
suffered enough?

204
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:31,910
Now keep drilling
for that petroleum oil,
you selfish cowards.

205
00:12:32,370 --> 00:12:35,250
Although, then again,
I guess any kind of oil
would be just as...

206
00:12:36,460 --> 00:12:37,460
Not my fault.

207
00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:43,720
(SINGING)
I am so great. Bender is great

208
00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:46,220
Bender, Bender, Bender

209
00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:47,930
Man, where'd the time go?

210
00:12:48,010 --> 00:12:50,680
Hey, you guys wanna...
Oh. Right.

211
00:12:51,560 --> 00:12:52,560
(GASPS)

212
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:56,150
They turned
into petroleum oil.

213
00:12:56,900 --> 00:12:59,730
I thought they were selfish,
yet in the end,

214
00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:03,150
it turns out it was I
who thought they were selfish.

215
00:13:06,780 --> 00:13:09,530
(HUMMING)

216
00:13:10,030 --> 00:13:12,450
Hey, ladies, I found some.
What the...

217
00:13:12,540 --> 00:13:13,910
(BOTH GRUNTING)

218
00:13:14,580 --> 00:13:16,170
There was only
enough petroleum oil

219
00:13:16,250 --> 00:13:18,250
for four and a half
weeks of oil wrestling,

220
00:13:18,330 --> 00:13:21,040
but it lasted
500 million years.

221
00:13:21,380 --> 00:13:23,050
It's a miracle.

222
00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:26,050
Happy Robanukah, everyone.

223
00:13:26,130 --> 00:13:30,600
Coming up next,
more thoughtful,
interfaith hijinks.

224
00:13:34,180 --> 00:13:37,060
MAN: And now,
the unrelated conclusion.

225
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,570
Hello, Fry.
Hey, Fry!

226
00:13:43,650 --> 00:13:44,780
How you doing?
What's up?

227
00:13:44,860 --> 00:13:47,610
LaBarbara, Hermes,
happy Kwanzaa.

228
00:13:47,700 --> 00:13:49,070
We brought a chocolate cake,

229
00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:51,740
but now I'm worried that
might be offensive
in some way.

230
00:13:51,830 --> 00:13:53,330
Just sit down.

231
00:13:54,370 --> 00:13:56,830
Happy Kwanzaa,
brother men and sister men.

232
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,670
Well, look at the cat
the cat dragged in.

233
00:13:59,750 --> 00:14:02,460
Kwanzaa tradition
encourages educational gifts.

234
00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:05,090
So I brought Dwight
my book on mathketball.

235
00:14:05,550 --> 00:14:08,090
Whoa!
Let me see that.

236
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:11,180
I'll sign it for you later.

237
00:14:11,260 --> 00:14:13,600
Man,
it's a cold one out there.

238
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,020
Barbados Slim?

239
00:14:15,100 --> 00:14:16,680
Come in, Barbados.

240
00:14:16,770 --> 00:14:20,940
Look at yourself,
all throbbing and shirtless
for the holiday.

241
00:14:21,230 --> 00:14:22,810
I hope you're
ready to celebrate.

242
00:14:22,900 --> 00:14:26,150
All night long, woman.
(CHUCKLES)

243
00:14:27,530 --> 00:14:30,200
I'm glad you all could be
here with my family.

244
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:34,950
Kwanzaa traditions
are quite ancient,
dating back over 1,000 years.

245
00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:36,370
Whoa!

246
00:14:36,450 --> 00:14:40,790
If only someone
could tell us more
about these traditions.

247
00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:43,380
Oh, yeah.

248
00:14:43,460 --> 00:14:44,880
Hey, Kool-Aid's here.

249
00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:47,840
No, child. That's not
a made-up character.

250
00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:49,130
It's Kwanzaa-bot.

251
00:14:49,220 --> 00:14:51,930
And I'm gonna tell you all
how we celebrate Kwanzaa.

252
00:14:52,010 --> 00:14:53,970
Zoidberg, lay down a beat.

253
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:56,390
How about I just lay down?

254
00:14:56,640 --> 00:14:58,100
(TRIBAL MUSIC PLAYING)

255
00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:03,310
(SINGING)
There's seven basic principles
that go to make up Kwanzaa

256
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:06,940
So sit your
asses down and have
some knowledge dropped upon ya

257
00:15:07,030 --> 00:15:08,650
Kujichagulia

258
00:15:08,740 --> 00:15:10,240
And Umoja.
And the rest!

259
00:15:10,320 --> 00:15:11,280
Now we get it

260
00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:13,660
Sit back down
There's gonna be a test

261
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:15,490
My favorite's Ujamaa

262
00:15:15,580 --> 00:15:17,200
Cooperative economics

263
00:15:17,290 --> 00:15:19,660
Yo, bulldog, I'm talking here
Put away the comics

264
00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:24,080
Ku'umba is another one
It stands for creativity

265
00:15:24,170 --> 00:15:27,800
Like the ever-changing nature
of my sexual proclivities

266
00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:31,050
I think there's one called Nia
but I don't speak Swahili

267
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:34,550
Something about a pine tree
and an oil-wrestling deal-y?

268
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:38,180
That's from Xmas and Robanukah
you plagiarizing lout

269
00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:41,600
Yeah, I'm kind of
losing interest here
I best be rolling out

270
00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:45,020
But before I go,
the most important thing

271
00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:46,820
What's that, black Santa?

272
00:15:46,900 --> 00:15:50,320
You need seven Kwanzaa candles
that you light up every night

273
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,070
But they best be
made of beeswax

274
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:53,860
or you all might
as well be white

275
00:15:54,240 --> 00:15:58,370
They must be made of beeswax
or we might as well be white

276
00:15:59,370 --> 00:16:01,460
Well, we got
no beeswax candles,

277
00:16:01,540 --> 00:16:05,210
but these scented
regular wax candles
will do just fine.

278
00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:08,590
Girl, those stink sticks
are for single women
who take baths.

279
00:16:08,670 --> 00:16:11,420
If your Kwanzaa candles
ain't 100% beeswax,

280
00:16:11,550 --> 00:16:13,260
you bring shame
on your people.

281
00:16:13,340 --> 00:16:14,930
Well, now that won't do.

282
00:16:15,050 --> 00:16:16,890
Husband,
show a little Ku'umba

283
00:16:16,970 --> 00:16:19,430
and fetch some beeswax
before Kwanzaa ends.

284
00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:21,930
Sweet candelabra of
La Habra, LaBarbara.

285
00:16:22,020 --> 00:16:23,890
Isn't this the last night
of Kwanzaa?

286
00:16:23,980 --> 00:16:25,650
Who the hell knows?

287
00:16:27,360 --> 00:16:30,570
Finally, a bee farm that's
open late on Kwanzaa.

288
00:16:30,780 --> 00:16:32,820
Madam, I need beeswax.

289
00:16:32,900 --> 00:16:35,200
You sure you don't need
a little honey, handsome?

290
00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:38,530
Maybe a taste of sweet nectar
straight from the hive?

291
00:16:38,620 --> 00:16:39,740
(ALL EXCLAIM IN DISGUST)

292
00:16:39,830 --> 00:16:43,080
I just need some beeswax
to make Kwanzaa candles.

293
00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:44,670
Well, that's too darn bad.

294
00:16:44,750 --> 00:16:47,330
There ain't no beeswax
in the whole world.

295
00:16:47,420 --> 00:16:50,670
Oh, no. This could be
the year without a Kwanzaa,

296
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,420
like every year before 1966.

297
00:16:53,510 --> 00:16:55,300
The bees are
acting all crazy

298
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:58,050
like they been drinking
Tang and cough syrup,

299
00:16:58,140 --> 00:17:01,180
or as I call it,
my Friday night.
(LAUGHS)

300
00:17:01,270 --> 00:17:02,640
(COUGHING)

301
00:17:03,350 --> 00:17:04,520
My God.

302
00:17:04,770 --> 00:17:09,020
It's Colony Collapse Syndrome.
The bees are swarming
with parasites.

303
00:17:09,190 --> 00:17:10,320
They're all dying.

304
00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:12,320
Yeah,
but what a way to go.

305
00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:15,530
"Die young,
leave a pretty corpse,"
that's what I say.

306
00:17:15,610 --> 00:17:17,320
You should say
something else.

307
00:17:17,410 --> 00:17:19,780
Wait. I know where
we can get beeswax.

308
00:17:19,870 --> 00:17:21,950
From those giant space bees
who nearly killed us,

309
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:23,870
and we swore we'd
never go back there.

310
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,750
Let's go back there.

311
00:17:30,420 --> 00:17:31,920
To communicate
with the bees,

312
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,630
we'll need to use
these trans-bumbleators.

313
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,840
Bender,
say something in bee talk.

314
00:17:36,970 --> 00:17:39,470
(BUZZING)

315
00:17:39,970 --> 00:17:43,010
I'm sorry, Bender.
What do you want me
to put on the glass?

316
00:17:43,100 --> 00:17:44,140
(BUZZING)

317
00:17:44,390 --> 00:17:46,480
Okay, if we survive.

318
00:17:54,990 --> 00:17:57,860
Something's wrong.
It's way too quiet.

319
00:17:57,990 --> 00:17:59,820
Like the deadly Prius.

320
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:03,120
FARNSWORTH: Ah,
here they come.

321
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:05,450
They're in attack formation.
They're gonna kill us.

322
00:18:10,250 --> 00:18:11,540
That was weird.

323
00:18:11,630 --> 00:18:14,630
It's like the
Jägermeister air show
all over again.

324
00:18:19,510 --> 00:18:21,140
According to Google Hive,

325
00:18:21,220 --> 00:18:23,600
we are at the exact center
of the honeycomb.

326
00:18:24,310 --> 00:18:26,480
And there's a Jamba
Juice 0.2 miles
that way.

327
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:28,850
Does that thing tell you
where the queen bee is?

328
00:18:28,940 --> 00:18:33,230
The big, fat, ugly,
compound-eyed,
hairy-thoraxed...

329
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,570
Don't be applying
your Eurocentric

330
00:18:35,650 --> 00:18:37,860
standards of
beauty to me, fool.

331
00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:41,620
What's with the
kamikaz-bees?

332
00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:43,950
Man, my hive's
been going buck-wild

333
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:47,540
since these blood-ganking
butt crabs moved in.

334
00:18:49,370 --> 00:18:51,170
Been there, done that.

335
00:18:51,250 --> 00:18:54,210
They're all infected,
just like the bees on Earth.

336
00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:57,710
Brother-sucking parasites gone
and disrupted our hive mind.

337
00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,630
Now, instead of
working in harmony,

338
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,140
my bees just talk
smack to each other.

339
00:19:02,220 --> 00:19:04,350
Are you all black
with yellow stripes

340
00:19:04,470 --> 00:19:06,600
or are you yellow
with black stripes?

341
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:09,350
Yellow with
black stripes, man.

342
00:19:09,770 --> 00:19:12,560
Why don't you just move along?

343
00:19:12,730 --> 00:19:14,980
Let me ask you something,
you sting my wife?

344
00:19:15,070 --> 00:19:16,650
What kind of
buzzing question is that?

345
00:19:16,730 --> 00:19:19,990
Where do you get
the wings big enough
to ask me that?

346
00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:27,490
Okay, gang.
We have plenty of beeswax.
Let's get back to the ship.

347
00:19:27,580 --> 00:19:29,700
No, we are not
going anywhere.

348
00:19:29,790 --> 00:19:32,370
I can't abide all
this bee-on-bee conflict.

349
00:19:32,460 --> 00:19:35,460
It's time to
African-Americanize
these honeybees.

350
00:19:37,130 --> 00:19:41,380
Listen up, bees.
It's Kwanzaa, a time of Umoja.

351
00:19:41,470 --> 00:19:43,090
It means "unity".

352
00:19:45,260 --> 00:19:47,970
You have to learn to
work together again.

353
00:19:48,060 --> 00:19:50,520
The crazy
tablecloth man is right.

354
00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:53,100
It's time to set
aside our differences.

355
00:19:53,940 --> 00:19:56,060
Black stripe, yellow stripe.

356
00:19:56,230 --> 00:20:00,030
At the end of the day,
we're just a couple
of darn talking space bees.

357
00:20:00,570 --> 00:20:02,240
Hey, forget about it.

358
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,910
Come here
and give me a sting.

359
00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:09,200
Look. The spirit of Kwanzaa
is killing the parasites.

360
00:20:09,290 --> 00:20:10,330
(ALL CHEERING)

361
00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:11,410
FRY: Yuck!

362
00:20:11,500 --> 00:20:12,960
But, yay!

363
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,790
Thank you, my human brother.

364
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:17,960
Your message of unity
has touched our souls.

365
00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:21,920
We are once again of
a single hive mind.

366
00:20:26,140 --> 00:20:27,930
(CRASHING)
KWANZAA-BOT: Oh, yeah.

367
00:20:28,010 --> 00:20:29,510
Hurray! Kwanzaa-bot's
here to save...

368
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:30,560
(SQUELCHING)

369
00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:32,180
They killed him.

370
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:39,940
Joyous Kwanzaa, everybody.

371
00:20:45,990 --> 00:20:47,320
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

372
00:20:47,410 --> 00:20:48,490
(CHUCKLING)

373
00:20:48,580 --> 00:20:51,950
Don't worry.
The Futurama crew
will be back next year

374
00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:56,370
with all new
episodes featuring Bender,
Leela and me, Al Gore,

375
00:20:56,460 --> 00:20:58,380
as Captain Lance Starman.

376
00:20:58,630 --> 00:21:01,960
And from all of us here
at Gunderson's Nuts,
happy holidays.

377
00:21:37,210 --> 00:21:38,210
ENGLISH - US - PSDH